Woodsmen: a truly vital defense

In a recent article, the burly Pete Cronkite and fashionable Sam Chase proposed a hypothetical scenario in which all of Waterville attacked Colby College. While the duo proposed a light-hearted and well-reasoned scenario, they made one fatal miscalculation: “Dude, the woodman’s club would be so useless.” The two are shortsighted to so quickly dismiss the lumberjack squad of Colby as […]

by Wes Zebrowski· · 0 comments · Opinion

L’Etivaz: the cream of the crop

If someone put a gun to my head and said “name your favorite cheese,” the first thing that would come to mind is L’Etivaz, a true alpine beauty. This ain’t your mother’s Gruyere; you can thank your Swiss great grandmother for this baby. To make a long story short, in the 1930s, a group of Gruyere-producing families believed that the […]

by Jon Eichholz· · 0 comments · Opinion

The scary reality of horror movies

Michael Meyers is murdering Annie Brackett. He is strangling her from behind in her car and she is screaming. And now she is straining forward to honk her car horn, trying to call for help. But to no avail; Michael Meyers is too strong. He is dragging her towards him and cutting her throat with his knife. She keels over […]

by Brandon Blackburn· · 0 comments · Opinion

Sodexo pie: better than meets the eye

The bustling kitchens of Bob’s produces many things: flatbread pizzas, rotisserie chickens, and even goat-cheese salads. However nothing can top the ruler of Bob’s cuisine: the pie. Sodexo’s pie of note this week was the Two-Layer Pumpkin. The fancy pie featured both a top layer of pumpkin pie and a bottom layer of cream, all atop a crumble crust. It […]

by Wes Zebrowski· · 0 comments · Opinion

Disciplinary immunity: a baby step toward alcohol reform

The first time I called security on an intoxicated student was earlier this year. For those of you who have read my previous pieces (all three of you), you’ll know that it happened in Heights, when I stumbled upon an unresponsive student alone in the bathroom. In that moment, it was undeniably the right thing to do. Still, that didn’t […]

by Jake Bleich· · 0 comments · Opinion

Long live the pump-king of beer!

It’s that time of year again. When the leaves change from green to red, the Patriots win game after game, and everyone whips out their Patagonia fleeces. Yeah, you guessed it… it’s Fall. However, campfires and pumpkin spice lattes shouldn’t be the only thing you’re looking forward to. When good ol’ autumn rolls around each year, so does the quintessential […]

by Jon Eichholz· · 0 comments · Opinion

The attack of the Watervillians

SAM: Ok first we need to like, define the parameters of this thing. PETE: Right, exact rules. What exact hypothetical situation are we going to be discussing here? SAM: Waterville like mobilizes a force against Colby. Everyone in Waterville just decides they’re going to attack everyone at Colby? PETE: Well it wouldn’t be like the entirety of Waterville, I think. […]

by Pete Cronkite· · 0 comments · Opinion

I’m neither a trick nor a treat

Halloween is one of my favorite holidays, and I think that a lot of that is due to the fact that it’s one of the few days I get to dress up in a ridiculous costume and have fun without judgment. Last year, for instance, I dressed up as a Power Ranger. While I’m still undecided on my costume this […]

by Grace C. Baldwin· · 0 comments · Opinion

Independent? Never heard of it

Recently, a good friend of mine recommended a certain band to me, which he referred to as “Indie.” To most college students this is a commonplace occurrence, but it can create quite an uncomfortable situation for anyone who isn’t quite sure what this “Indie” thing is. Thankfully, some simple knowledge on genres can diffuse the most awkward of “Indie” music […]

by Wes Zebrowski· · 0 comments · Opinion

Sexism (noun): words we use for girls

The other day, my friend told me that the next step in her feminist agenda was to start referring to older females as “women” instead of “girls.” “We always say ‘men’ and ‘guys’ when referring to males above the age of 15 or so, but we still say ‘girls’ even when referring to women in their twenties and thirties. It […]

by Megan Lasher· · 0 comments · Opinion